My aunt and uncle, longtime Upper West Siders love telling stories about Morris, the deli counter man at the old Daitch Shopwell that used to be on Broadway. They adored Morris and the little old ladies who would visit him. This is what they overheard:

Old Lady: Is the potato salad fresh?

Morris: Yes, I just brought it out.

Old Lady: It looks like from yesterday.

Morris: Lady, you’re from yesterday.

Old Lady: How’s the roast beef?

Morris: Gorgeous.

Old Lady: Give me a half a quarter of baloney.

Morris: You’re having a party?